sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
