It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Randomize
