3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Randomize
