I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
