like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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