dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
