How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
