Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
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