why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
I have grass duct taped all over my body
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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