Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
