Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
You dont lie about slip and slides
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Holy shit dude........stairs
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