Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
