so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Randomize
