So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Randomize