I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
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