my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
