I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Randomize
