When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
