Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize