you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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