She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
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