omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Randomize
