The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
