Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
