i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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