My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
