This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
