I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
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