id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
He keeps bees of course he's weird
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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