D3 body, D1 cock
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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