Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
