So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
