Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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