bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
I forget how to act sober
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