ya dads aren't the best wingmen
I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
i already hear my dad disowning me
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Randomize
