haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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