somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize