you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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