i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Randomize
