Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
