Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Randomize
