Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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