sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Randomize
