How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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