it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
