Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.

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(908): View more from New Jersey

Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold

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(440): View more from Ohio

"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."

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(720): View more from Colorado

I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match

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(321): View more from Florida Space Coast

as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.

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(770): View more from Georgia

I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.

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(416): View more from Toronto

When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons

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(231): View more from Michigan

BRING THE BAGELS

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(651): View more from Minnesota

fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me

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