Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
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