My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
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