I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Randomize
