i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize