She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
