I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
Randomize
