I've blown a few things in my day
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
