Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
